I’ve been unfriended.

Oh, it’s happened more than once. I’ve been booted by several Facebook friends.  Alright, I am a little ashamed, but I’ll work through it.

I post. A lot. Apparently this offends people. I’m perplexed. If it so offensive, why have a Facebook account? Isn’t it a social network?

Recently I discovered a friend had deleted me. I saw that the person had tagged mutual friends in old pictures. Hmmm. I was in some of those tagged pictures. Why wasn’t I tagged? I investigated. Sure enough, a quick visit to her homepage proved that we’d broken up. I don’t even know when she broke up with me. But it was over between us.

The break up made things uncomfortable during that reunion last week. We made forced small talk. All the while I was dancing around the nagging question: why’d you delete me? Maybe it’s the fact that she’s younger and still single. I’m older, married and most of my posts are centered around my kids. Not sure. But, the real life friend she’d showed up with that night, jogged my memory. Didn’t I…hadn’t I…yes! Oh no. I’d unfriended the friend. Her date.

I guess it was her constant postings about world travels, her newlywed adventures into the mystical unknown. Such a different reality from my current season of life. It was hard to relate. So, I’m wiping tiny bottoms and climbing Mt. Laundry, while you’re zip lining in Costa Rica?

This is just the unfolded, clean stuff, folks.

This is just the unfolded, clean stuff, folks.

I never dreamed we’d see each other again. I’d friended her to snoop on her page. In real life, years ago, we’d been mere acquaintances, not actual friends.  I’m nosy by nature. After the initial snoop, I’d seen quite enough, thank you. I guess I could’ve simply hidden her posts. Why, though, really? Our paths weren’t likely to ever cross. So, I deleted.

There have been those friends whose pictures I’ve noticed in my People You May Know scroll, whom I distinctly remember being friends with at one point. I wonder what made them jump ship? Could it have been the close ups of my toddler’s scream fest? Oh, I know…that rainy day I let the boys loose in the muddy backyard, then posted pics? Was it another post about my toilet overflowing yet again? Back when I lived in newborn purgatory, and my life was a total whirlwind of poop, puke and nonstop nursing, I actually had a friend remark, you really do post about poop and barf a lot. Welcome to my reality, sweet cheeks!

In real life, we have our close friends, our acquaintances and those people whom we smile at through clenched teeth. Facebook is the same. We can’t please everyone all the time. And who the heck would want to? Life would be so dull without different opinions and personalities. So, go ahead. Post your Facebook update. If they don’t like it, they just might unfriend you.